Progress with.. some.. story?
I was .. erm, inspired to write a story about a man and his nipples.
Read if you like weird stuff.
One dreadful morning I woke up and my nipples tasted like milk duds. I knew from that moment on that my life would be changed forever.
My name is Edward Colon and I am 42 years old. At the time of this horrid yet fascinating event I was still living in my dead mother's basement, getting off on pregnant Japanese midget porn. It was a very depressing point in my life, I was too apathetic to find a real job after getting fired at Wendy's for dropping a hot rock on someone's burger. At the time it didn't seem so important as I still had a roof over my head and some extra money, but now as I am telling this story, I am living in a box with nothing but a notebook and a chewed up pencil. I will retell this story with as much accuracy as possible.
As I previously mentioned, I woke up and discovered the strange milk duddy taste of my nipples. I'm sure you're thinking, "How on Earth did he lick his nipples with such ease? Why?" Well, for one thing, it was no easy task. For another thing, I licked it out of curiosity and extreme boredom. I'm not really sure how I did it, but after a lot of unwanted pain and noise, I came through and managed to successfully lick my right nipple. I'd rather not talk about it, but for you lovely readers, I'll do it. I was sitting in my small bed with no sheets, which was covered in potato chips from the night before, and I was propped up on my favorite polka dot pillow. My head was pounding from my hangover and I was shirtless, sitting in silence and staring down at my hairy bare chest. I was gazing into my nipples, which were erect. No, I wasn't turned on by anything, I believe the window was open and there was a strong, cold wind.
Current Music: today by jefferson airplane.